Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
