It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did angry sex become our thing?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize