nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.