she woke up with a sticky ear
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
