I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
