Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
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