I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
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And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
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Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...