a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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