you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Randomize
