it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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