I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize