do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Im just a social blackout drinker.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Randomize
