just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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