Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
