And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
