question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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