Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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