Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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