If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
