it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I supernannyed him into submission
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
