whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
