come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
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On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
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But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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