it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
