Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
