Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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