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• (440): View more from Ohio

  pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (609): View more from New Jersey

  get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (845): View more from New York

  There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  It would have only made it one day at my place.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.

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