:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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