Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Randomize
