Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize