Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Floor bacon is actually really good
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
