i think my tv is drunk
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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