I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Randomize
