also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
