So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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