apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
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