he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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