I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
