what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
