so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize