My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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