lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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