Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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