worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
