So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
