I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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