white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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