i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
