CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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