You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
