drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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